links

title

Pachter's Pointers:
Business Etiquette Tips & Career Suggestions


4.13.2016

Fightin’ words: Questions to avoid asking (or answering) at work

I can’t believe he asked me who I was going to vote for.  We have a private ballot box for a reason!

It can be tempting to ask provocative, challenging or personal questions. What’s the harm in finding out who your colleagues think should win the election, or asking their opinions about the death penalty?

Don’t do it. I know that asking questions is one of the ways to engage with people. Yet, if you ask certain types of questions, you could embarrass people or get an answer you didn’t expect, or want.The discussion that follows can quickly escalate into an argument, and easily become heated. 

Avoid asking the following types of questions: 

1. Questions involving money. These include anything along these lines:
--“How can you afford that handbag (or those fancy shoes)?”
--“How much money do you make?”
--“What did you pay for your house?”

The answers to questions like these are not your business, and by asking them, you are likely to make the other person uncomfortable.

2. Political questions. These include, “For whom are you going to vote?” or “How can you vote for...?”  Your opinion of the person you’re questioning can be altered, often negatively, if he or she is not voting for your candidate. And the other person’s opinion of you may change, too.

3. Questions on controversial topics. These are similar to political questions. If you ask someone about his or her opinion on the death penalty, animal rights, abortion, etc., you may get an answer you weren’t expecting. You could subsequently get into an unpleasant exchange, as these are the kinds of topics on which people try to change other’s beliefs.

4. Very personal questions. These include, “What’s your sexual orientation?” “How old are you?” “Are you pregnant?” (Avoid this one at all costs!)  “Are you having an affair with_____?” If your colleague wanted you to know the answers to these questions, he or she would have told you.


5. Negative questions. These include such questions as: “How can you stand working with _____?”  “Don’t you think the boss’s position on ______ is outrageous?”  “Why did you cut your hair/shave your beard? I liked it better the other way.” These questions are really judgment statements, and can become fighting words.  

Additional information on making conversation can be found in my book The Essentials of Business Etiquette: How to Greet, Eat, and Tweet Your Way to Success. 

Pachter & Associates provides seminars and coaching on communication, business writing, presentation skills, professional presence, and etiquette. For additional information, please contact Joyce Hoff at  joyce@pachter.com or 856.751.6141. 







17 comments:


  1. we should implement that in practically then only we can understand that exact thing clearly, but it’s no need to do it, because you have explained the concepts very well.

    Sharepoint Training in Chennai

    ReplyDelete
  2. Unwanted questions always make problems. So, it is better to avoid the types of questions mentioned over here. You can ask questions regarding academic papers with the experts of buy dissertation online service.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Anonymous6/19/2016

    In answer to the question "How are you going to vote?", reply "By secret ballot."

    ReplyDelete
  4. This original placed is incredibly helpful not forgetting is likely to make a great extremely respectable go through the pleased with my own character. No acquire beginer I recently investigate your internet site, yet I recently has been fundamentally enormously floored. Have got submit as i morning hours browsing arrive at read that once more typical!

    ReplyDelete
  5. Asking people to leave a review at your Google Places page, or use them in your marketing material. People can scan QR codes with their phones and it will take them to a webpage. A great place to include them is the lobby of your community, any social area, and on the hallways of your community. An example of a QR code is to the right. Scan it with your smartphone and it will take you to the SeniorMarketing.com homepage.http://suportdirecotry.podomatic.com/entry/2016-07-02T05_09_18-07_00

    ReplyDelete
  6. An fascinating discussion is value comment. I think that it is best to write extra on this matter, it won’t be a taboo topic however generally people are not enough to talk on such topics. To the next. Cheers forex trade signals

    ReplyDelete
  7. English writing is an art; however, any of us can make it effective in any field of life if we constantly keep on improving it. The following article will show you how you can instantly correct your English grammar writing by using advanced technology. See more english grammar correction

    ReplyDelete
  8. thanks great info and also nicely presented linux training in chennai thanks

    ReplyDelete
  9. After years of solid use I needed to replace my Timberland Boots. But I had been out of work for four months and did not want to spend a lot of many for a new pair of boots. So where do you buy cheap Timberland boots for men when you don't have a lot of cash. You go online.I find this website for Cheap Work Boots you can visit this site.

    ReplyDelete
  10. September 16, 2006. I turn on the news and I see: Muslims Playing the We're-Offended Card Once Again. It goes further than that, of course. "We're offended. Our feelings are hurt. Our religion has been insulted. We demand an apology." Read More

    ReplyDelete
  11. Have you watched social indiscretions and outright wrong conduct at conferences? Have you ever observed somebody make a trick of themselves in a conference? Do you feel great in knowing what to do as appropriate business manners in a conference?

    ReplyDelete
  12. Very useful for this tips for job seekers like php openings in hyderabad. Thanks for providing this informative.

    ReplyDelete
  13. The discussion that follows can quickly escalate into an argument, and easily become heated.
    http://www.biographywritingservices.com/biography-words-for-professional-bio/

    ReplyDelete

Note: Only a member of this blog may post a comment.